The Ultimate Guide to Life Coach Salaries

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20 Hottest Life Coaching Niches for 2021... And Beyond

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2021 State of Life Coaching & The Wellness Economy

Make the most of emerging trends within this $4.5 trillion industry.

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Belief Systems: What Are They, And How Should We Navigate Them As Coaches?
The importance of understanding your (and your client's) beliefs
Oct 22, 2021
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The Everything Life Coaching Podcast, featuring JRNI Coaching founders John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux, is a deep dive into the experience and business of being a life coach. In this episode, we explore where personal belief systems come from, and how to navigate them in a coaching relationship. Subscribe to get new episodes weekly!

Belief Systems: What Are They, How Do They Rule Our Lives?

Belief systems are the principles that guide us through our everyday life. They’re unique to each of us, and consist of a set of principles and facts that help us interpret our reality. Often they are codified in large societal structures such as religious, political, and philosophical systems. 

Our beliefs have a profound impact on our identity. And yet, many of the beliefs that form our very foundation reside in the unconscious. That’s not so surprising when you think about it! Our brain is exposed to a vast amount of information over the course of our lives, but we’re only consciously aware of a fraction of it. 

Over time, our personal beliefs are shaped by a variety of factors: 

  • Our knowledge on a certain topic
  • The way we were raised
  • Peer pressure 
  • What we’ve learned about concepts of right and wrong, proper and improper, and other ideas we may have picked up about “The way we do things around here”

Our subconscious mind tucks away so much, absorbing messages from the world around us. As a result, most of us end up with a grab-bag of beliefs that have been heavily influenced by forces outside our direct control. In addition to what we take in from our family and community, this includes factors such as where we happened to grow up, and the physical body we were born into. 

In the early part of our lives, there isn’t a lot of choice and free will around the messages and beliefs we are exposed to. It’s only as we mature and become adults that we develop more conscious choices around what we want to believe.

We are living through a time where people are having seismic shifts in their relationship to deeply held beliefs. Coaches can be of real service to this process, walking together with our clients through these massive - and often difficult - changes.

How to Navigate Beliefs In the Coaching Space

Coaching is a place where our clients gain self-awareness in order to move forward with goal accomplishment. In this process, core belief systems are often challenged. When a client discovers that certain things they held as true may instead be based in faulty belief systems, things can get uncomfortable. 

In coaching, it’s important to be aware of how our clients are experiencing their own belief systems, especially during times when those beliefs may be under fire. This can happen both as a person questions their own beliefs, as well as when a strongly held belief is being challenged from the outside. 

A great example of this on the collective level that's been unfolding in real time is the shift in public perception of employers and corporations. In 2020, the British think tank WelltoDo published the results of a study showing that the general public in Western society held more trust in corporations and corporate leaders than in governmental or religious sectors. Their findings at the time revealed that consumers expected transparency, and that employees expected their employers would serve as a stable and protective force. 

In 2021, those beliefs completely changed. As the pandemic raged on, trust in employers sunk to an all time low. And as we record this podcast episode, the corporate sector is reeling from the “Great Resignation.”  

“Workers aren't just looking for higher pay, more time off, or more days at home (though those things would surely help in the short term). They're actually questioning the whole meaning of the daily grind. Why do we put so much of ourselves into our careers? And are we getting a fair deal from our employers in return for all this stress and heartache?” - Jessica Stillman, 

This is just one example of a rapid and massive belief system shift, and one you may be encountering directly in your work with clients.

Practice Tips for Coaches

As you’re thinking about how to incorporate an understanding of belief systems into your own coaching practice, consider the following.

1. When someone’s core belief is challenged, anger is a normal response

This is where coach training comes into play - we learn to allow for strong emotions in session. When held properly, processing big emotions like anger, fear and regret can result in increased gains in self-awareness.

When a coach shies away from the Big Feels, this does not serve the client. The right way to handle it is to hold space. Allow your client to vent, clear, experience and work through all of those feeling. This is a necessary part of opening up internal space for a new way of being.

Clearing and venting is only one part of the coaching process, however. The following step involves exploring the question: “What next?” When it comes to moving from processing to action, the standard for coaches is to work at the pace of the client. If your client is not ready to start exploring what’s on the other side of that anger, it isn’t your role to push.

2. Take your own feels out of the equation

We are all in this collective cognitive meltdown together. It would be faulty to assume that we as coaches are not challenged by the very same issues that our clients might be experiencing at this time.

As helping professionals, we need to be hyper-focused on this so we can become part of the solution. If you are not actively aware of your own belief systems - and how those may collide with your client’s own beliefs - that's a problem. Strife, disappointment, conflict or sadness are likely to result.

One of the core International Coaching Federation standards of coaching is to employ a coaching mindset. What this asks of us is to consciously work to identify personal triggers alongside holding space for a client’s personal response. This is an art, and a core competency of coaching that is essential for all coaches to master.

This is one reason why formal coach training is so important.

Without proper training, it’s much more likely that your unconscious beliefs and views will enter into the coaching space. For more on how to hold space effectively as a coach, explore: How To Hold Space for Others.

Here's how to manage your own triggers as they arise in a coaching session (and you're human, so they will!):

  1. Observe any feeling of “ouch,” judgement or anger that comes up.
  2. Note to yourself: “This is mine.”
  3. Put a pin in it mentally so you can return for further reflection at a later time.

Do take the time to reflect and take care of yourself. This might look like journaling on what came up for you and considering any of your own core beliefs that may have been challenged. It may involve a follow up conversation with your client. If you feel this is a trigger point that has potential to become recurring, seek guidance and support from a mentor, coach or therapist.

This is an ongoing process and something that helping professionals have to be very aware of, and especially at this time. 

3. Check in with your client

Before diving in, find out if they are ready to start exploring what's arising for them as a result of new awareness. Not everyone is ready to immediately dive in and get to work when a really big belief system is first challenged. As a coach, you might be more ready than your client to move to the next level of awareness, but the pacing is not up to you. In coaching, we always follow the pace of the learner.

Above all, be gentle with yourself or others. The past few years have been a challenging time collectively. Assume that every single person you encounter is carrying a heavy internal load. We are in this as one big human family, and the only way out is through.

Want to Become A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

The Business of Life Coaching
How to Set Your Rates and Create Coaching Packages
Explore pricing formulas and industry benchmarks to help set your fees
Oct 21, 2021
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The Business of Life Coaching
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Determining what to charge for your services is one of the biggest decisions you’ll need to make as a professional coach. Set a coaching rate that’s too low, and your business won’t be sustainable. But if you overshoot what your ideal clients are willing to pay, that’s not a long term recipe for success either!

In this article, we’ll explore how to confidently set your coaching fees. In the sections that follow, you’ll learn:

  • How to find industry benchmarks and average life coach rates 
  • Why you need to think beyond an “hourly rate”
  • How much YOU need to earn to be viable
  • The way most coaches really earn a living
  • How to establish a Signature coaching program

Coaching Industry Intel

The good news is that you’re not operating in a vacuum. There are tens of thousands of coaches successfully doing business today, which means we’ve got some serious market data to work with! 

There are many sources online that publish life coach salaries. From the Bureau of Labor to PayScale, you’re going to see a wide range of figures. It's not that average coach salary data is difficult to find - the challenge is in deciding which figures are most credible. 

In our view, the International Coaching Federations’s ICF Global Coaching Study is THE go-to source for industry information and analysis. Conducted once every four years, this expansive research study analyzes responses from more than 22,000 coaches worldwide. In this article we’re referencing the ICF’s most recent results, published in 2020. 

We’ve poured through its contents to simplify what the survey reveals, and how those findings relate to you.

Here’s how the numbers break down by coaching specialty:

  • Life coaches average $130 per hour
  • Business coaches average $330 per hour

Now let’s check out coaching rates by years of experience:

  • >1 year experience = $128 per hour
  • 1-2 years = $152 per hour
  • 3-4 years = $194 per hour
  • 5-10 years = $256 per hour
  • 10+ years = $321 per hour

Benchmarking data can be a useful starting point, and for many people knowing the averages can feel helpful. With that said, it’s also only one factor in determining what rate makes most sense for YOU to charge. Let’s take a look at what else you’ll want to consider.

Do you have an Entrepreneur Mindset?

Is starting a life coaching business your first foray into self employment? If so, charging your clients $100 or more for an hour-long session might feel like a big leap at first! Feeling tentative about this is perfectly normal. The important thing is that you don’t transfer that uncertainty onto your clients.

Many who are just starting out wonder, “Am I really worth it?”

If that’s you, chances are you may be wrestling with Imposter Syndrome. If you need some tools to help overcome it, check out this resource: How to Handle Imposter Syndrome (As A Life Coach).

Our best advice? Price your services correctly from the start. For many new coaches, this may require a mental shift from an “employee” mindset to that of a professional service provider. 

Here’s a quick example to illustrate the point:

The average annual coach salary in North America is $66,500. If that translated to a standard 40 hour a week job, your “rate” would break down to $31.85 per hour. 

So why are even brand new coaches charging 3-4 times that amount?

Simple: for every hour you spend with a client, there are several hours required behind the scenes to run your coaching business. As a new life coach, the way your energy gets divided may surprise you at first!

Diagram "How most new coaches actually spend their time"

Many life coaches spend 40% of their time doing marketing, 20% handling business and administrative tasks, and 20% of their time in client sessions. The rest of the time may be devoted to other services they offer.

As your coaching practice and reputation grows, these ratios will most likely shift away from business administration and sales to more direct client hours. Even so, you’ll always need to dedicate a certain amount of time toward running the business and attracting new clients (or hire someone to handle this for you!) 

As a business owner, you’ll want to separate the idea of an “hourly rate” from what you charge for a coaching session. What life coaches charge reflects the market value of the coaching services being provided. Your fee should be at a level that ensures your coaching practice is sustainable. 

So, with all this in mind - what’s the right way of pricing a coaching service?

What’s Your Ideal Client Willing to Pay?

When it comes to pricing a coaching package, your mindset isn’t the only thing that figures into the equation. You’ll also need to consider the mindset and realities of the clients you are planning to serve.

As you no doubt noticed above, there’s a big spread between what different types of coaches are charging. Can you guess why that is? 

A great deal depends on who is paying your fee, what results the client expects from working together, and how they perceive the value of those outcomes.

Business coaches have a direct impact on a company’s bottom line, and can help drive higher performance and earnings. There’s often a clear return on investment from dollars spent on coaching. The benefits of “life coaching”, on the other hand, are equally real… but may not be as easily translated in such quantifiable terms. 

If you know a business investment is likely to pay itself back several times over, the cost/benefit is simple to measure. But when it comes to personal transformation, what evidence might your client need to be assured that the investment they are making to work with you will be worth it?

To discover what people might be willing to pay for your coaching services, consider the following:

  • What’s the outcome you’re offering, and how can you prove you’re able to deliver it?
  • Do you have a sense of how much disposable income your ideal clients might have to work with?
  • What are their attitudes and beliefs about making a large financial investment in themselves?
  • Is the coaching you’ll provide primarily for personal or professional growth? Will their employer be sponsoring the coaching fees?

Not sure who your ideal clients are? If you haven’t decided what your coaching speciality is, you’ll want to do that! For insight into what’s trending, check out our guide: 20 Hottest Life Coaching Niches.

How to Set Your Coaching Fees

Let's start with some basic math. You may have experimented with some of these calculations already, but if not then now’s the time! 

FORMULA: Desired Net Income + Expenses + Taxes ÷ Annual Hours = Hourly Rate

Here's how to get to the numbers you'll plug into your formula:

  • What’s your desired NET income? (How much you’ll "take home" after taxes & business expenses)
  • Estimate your annual business expenses. (Website, scheduling tools, software, equipment, space, insurance, etc.)
  • Identify a flat tax rate based on your personal situation. (28% is a standard place to start if you’re not sure)
  • What’s the number of hours you want to work? (Include however many holidays, “paid vacations, etc. you want so you can calculate the actual number of days you intend to actually work per year!)


  • I want to earn $75,000 NET
  • I think my expenses will be around $8,000
  • I'd like 10 national holidays, plus 4 weeks of vacation
  • I plan to work 5 days a week, with 4 billable hours per day

This comes out to 230 days of work, which translates into 920 billable working hours.

Now let's plug those numbers into the formula to calculate the hourly rate you'll need to average in order to meet your net income target:

$75,000 net + $8,000 expenses + $21,000 taxes/ 920 = $113/hour

Know How Coaches Really Make A Living

Remember that ICF coach salary survey? It reveals another fun fact that’s useful to know as you're considering how to make a sustainable living in the coaching industry. Check this out:

More than half the coaches surveyed have more than one income stream.

In other words, the majority of professional coaches are doing something in addition to working with clients in one-on-one coaching sessions.

Other income pathways include:

  • Group Coaching
  • Membership Programs
  • Podcasting
  • Guest lecturing
  • Courses
  • Retreats
  • Writing
  • Consulting
  • Products

Combining 1:1 coaching with other offerings doesn’t just increase your annual revenue. Diversification is also a smart strategy for buffering against the natural ebbs and flows in your coaching roster. Sometimes you may be working with 15 clients at once. Other times, you might have just 2 or 3 people on the books. Having multiple revenue streams can help even out that ride. 

Many of the "other services" that coaches offer act as a pipeline for attracting new 1:1 clients. One or two low priced entry offers can lead to high ticket coaching package sales down the road.

Points of entry services include e-books, pre-recorded classes, online workshops, webinars, and membership programs. Done well, these products can provide you with “evergreen” income while also building an audience for your other services.

Looking for other ideas on how to put your coaching skills to work? Check out Careers in Life Coaching: Options and Opportunities. This handy guide includes a list of companies that hire life coaches.

How to Create a Signature Coaching Package

Beyond bundling coaching packages into sets of 5 or 10 consecutive sessions, a “Signature” coaching program offers participants a clearly defined experience. We're talking now about programs designed to help clients achieve a particular outcome. Your Signature offer is about guiding people through the process of transformation within your particular coaching specialty or niche. For this reason, Signature programs command a premium price.

So how do you create Signature coaching services?

1. Define the result

What will you help your ideal client achieve? To create a coaching program that sells, begin by identifying the transformation participants can expect from your program. Ideally, this is clearly stated in 12 words or fewer, using language that resonates for your potential client.

Sample offer statements:

  • “I help women overcome stress and anxiety, naturally.”
  • “I help singers transform into extraordinary artists.”
  • “I help professionals and businesses break through career plateaus.”
  • “I help exhausted women take their energy back.”
  • “I help LGBTQ+ folks become rejection proof.”

2. Develop the structure

Consider what components you plan to include in your program, and how long will it take to achieve the desired results. 8-12 weeks is considered the “sweet spot” for many coaching programs. That's generally long enough to achieve results, but not so long that people begin to lose focus and momentum.

Come up with your weekly themes or topics, along with exercises and homework that will stay constant for all participants. Throughout the program, expect to also layer in action steps that are uniquely tailored for each client.

Decide what the experience looks like inside the program. 

  • How will the weekly lessons be delivered? 
  • Is it a live experience, or will you be providing a pre-recorded online coaching course?
  • Will it consist of 1:1 sessions with you, or group coaching?
  • Is it meant to be an individual experience, or will there be a community component such as group calls or an online discussion forum?
  • Will you be enlisting other experts to contribute content and add to the overall experience for your clients?

Remember that whatever you come up with today isn’t set in stone. Don’t be afraid to mix things up and make changes to the program as you go. 

3. Pricing

Transformation has value, and a Signature program that delivers on the promised results is worth more than the sum of its parts! In this sense, there isn’t a standard formula for figuring it out. Programs in the 8-12 week range are priced anywhere from $1,000 - $5,000 (and beyond).

Some factors to consider when setting your price point:

  • What expertise do you bring to the table?
  • How much experience do you have coaching people within this niche?
  • Is your program still in BETA testing?
  • Do you have a track record of helping clients achieve the transformation you’ve described for the program, along with testimonials to back it up?

If you haven’t already done so, consider doing some market research at this stage. Are there similar services out there in your niche? What do they entail, and what’s the pricing look like?

Adding It Up!

Whether you're delivering one on one coaching, or plan to offer a Signature coaching program, remember that your initial pricing isn’t set in stone. This is one reason why some coaches choose not to publish coaching rates. As you learn, adjust and grow your approach or program, and accumulate client success stories, you may quickly decide to adjust the price.


Grab your copy of our guide: 6 Steps To Start Coaching Today!

6 Steps To Start Coaching Today booklet

This free publication, written by JRNI Coaching co-founders John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux, will give you the tools to discover your niche, find clients, and get started on your path to becoming a successful coach.

Plus, when you sign up -- we'll keep you up to date weekly with coaching techniques, and the occasional much-needed kick in the pants to keep you motivated on your coaching journey.

So, what're you waitin' for? Let's get started!

Play: The Essential Ingredient To A Thriving Life
Guest blog by Sharon Calderón
Oct 20, 2021
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Guest blog by Sharon Calderón

Sharon Calderon

Sharon is no stranger to taking chances and living a life she loves on purpose. She is an emotional wellness and resilience coach as well as a play activist. Through her own life experiences with adversity, she has discovered how the power of reclaiming play and recognizing the importance of emotional nourishment are keys to helping overcome even life’s most challenging situations. 

She embraces the vibrancy of what life has to offer, and makes radical authenticity a non-negotiable in every venture she takes on. She will dare you to dive head first into your dreams and aspirations with equal measures of courage and love, all the while being a warm support to hold you through your own process of self discovery.

Sharon Calderón is 2021 graduate of the JRNI Coaching Intensive. She would love for you to connect on her internet playgrounds on Instagram @shar.ingcreations or by visiting her website https:/  

How Returning to Play Shaped My Path as A Coach

For as long as I can recall, I’ve enjoyed seeing people shine in their self expression and helping others grow to their fullest potential. You might say that was a positive side effect from childhood trauma, but that's another story for another day.  

What I remember vividly is wanting to help friends communicate their differences to find understanding and empathy. As you might imagine, this made me an excellent playground friendship mediator! In high school, I enjoyed guiding and supporting others into their confidence and skill in my role as the alto section leader for our choir. 

But could I make a career out of these naturally emerging skills?

Throughout my childhood and even well into adulthood, I never identified with just one job as an answer to the prevalent question: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” It seemed like a daunting (and honestly boring) undertaking to pick just ONE thing to do for the rest of my life. 

I have many unique passions, and as a self proclaimed multi-hyphenate, I knew I needed variety to help me feel most alive. Only problem was, I listened to other people’s advice on what path I should take. This led me down some interesting roads, but they never felt quite my own.

Fast forward a few years. With the advent of the pandemic, I - along with the rest of humanity - was given the opportunity to spend a portion of time in a vortex to ponder the significance of my life. There’s nothing like a bit of daily existential dread to help wake up to the longings of one’s heart!

I asked myself a question I think many of us were asking ourselves at that point: 

“What do I want to do?”

As I got still in the silence, I found my answer:

 “I want to do FUN!”

I had no logical explanation at that point of what “fun” as a career looked like for me. No path ahead saying, “Here’s what’cha do and who to talk to next to live out your purpose”. I simply remembered the feeling of joy during my time as an early childhood educator. I wanted to recreate the fun, but bring in my drive to make an impact with it in an even greater way. 

Instead of trying to figure it all out at once, I allowed myself to open up and receive whatever came up as my truth. I followed that feeling like a compass, on a quest to locate my true-north direction. During the process, I developed a deep trust in myself as I realized that this journey was mine to experience. 

I would never have guessed what would come next. Little did I know that within the next year I would be helping others do this exact same thing as a coach! 

Why Play? 

I will shout this till the cows come home: Play is for ALL.  

Trust me, I get it - as an adult, you may not necessarily subscribe to the word “play”. Just hear me out! If you’re already sensing some resistance to this idea, that’s an interesting thing to get curious about. I’ve found that what we resist or cast a skeptical light towards is often the thing that helps us find deeper meaning and self awareness. 

Play can be identified in many ways and is called many things: 

  • Passion
  • Desire
  • Pleasure
  • Art
  • Joy
  • Fun
  • Indulgence
  • Learning
  • Enjoyment
  • Excitement
  • Exploration  

You get to define it. Play is anything that aligns with the creation of positive experiences in life that don’t require a specific “result”. 

And who doesn’t want a healthy dose of all of that goodness?

The Power of Play

My mission as a play activist is to help make the concepts of play not only accessible but achievable. I like to think of this work as a homecoming, a vital component to rehumanizing humanity. It’s time to reframe the way we value play in society, to help us evolve from survival and oppressive states to truly thriving within ourselves and in our communities.

Play is the sacred process of learning how to become a human being. And I’m here to suggest that most of us have had or are suffering from an epidemic of different proportions. Our culture suffers from an emotional and spiritual malnourishment known as play deprivation. 

Dr. Stuart Brown, the granddaddy of modern day play research and the founder of the National Institute for Play, identified the consequences of play deprivation as a “lack of vital life engagement; diminished optimism; stuck-in-a-rut feeling about life with little curiosity or exploratory imagination to alter their situation; predilection to escapist temporary fixes…alcohol, excessive exercise, (or other compulsions); a personal sense of being life’s victim rather than life’s conqueror.” (source: Consequences of Play Deprivation). 

I believe every person deserves to live a joy-filled life, in whatever way they wish to create it for themselves. 

That being said, in order for each of us to truly enjoy those freedoms, there must be acknowledgement and discussion of the oppressive systems that perpetuate societal issues of disconnection and suffering. I acknowledge that the thought of play can seem like one of privilege. This is my “why” for committing to serving others and standing in agreement that play is a human rights issue.

Play and Coaching

In my world, these two concepts go hand in hand. Coaching is the vehicle, and play is the highway to get my clients where they want to go and who they want to be.

My work as a Play Coach involves being curious and asking questions that allow my client’s deep inner wisdom to shine as a beacon to illuminate their personal path. Through this process, clients experience the freedom to express and discover themselves in a new and expansive way. Sometimes it feels like magic - an evolution taking place before my very eyes!

Lasting results take intentional work. But that work doesn’t always have to be difficult! 

As coaches, we help our clients explore the unconscious mind. We assist them in figuring out where they may be on “autopilot” and repeating patterns that keep them feeling stuck. Doing so opens up a mental doorway, allowing them to more purposefully choose actions that support their desired life goals. 

We’re learning more about the power of play every day. With the advancements in research across a whole host of multidisciplinary studies such as positive psychology, emotional intelligence, performance science, neuroscience/neuroplasticity, trauma-informed care and somatic experiencing, the long-lasting positive effects play has on our daily lives has never been more evident.

As simple as it is to say “play more and you’ll feel amazing!”, there is more nuance to adding purposeful play that needs exploring.

Coaching Tools

Here’s a few simple questions that you can use for yourself or your clients to help find the joy.

1. What is getting in the way of you choosing joy for yourself daily?

2. What would you do/be/have if nothing got in the way of that daily joy?

Time to daydream! Envisioning helps us create the embodied emotions of what we want to feel in the future right here in the present. By simulating the feelings during a coaching session, your client can gain access to a full body recognition when they are outside of session. That is the real “ah-ha”! 

3. What would your play look like to you? 

Identifying anything we used to be passionate about or interested in during childhood gives excellent clues as to what we may want to try now.

4. What would help you maintain play as a part of your daily life?

Play for Thriving

“We are never more fully alive, more completely ourselves, or more deeply engrossed in anything than when we are playing.” - Charles Schaefer, American psychologist and "Father of Play Therapy" 

By supporting and embracing a play-full life, you are helping to develop a counter culture that has the ability to break so many barriers. When we’re operating from joy, we’re:

  • Promoting a more consciously aware society that’s able to generate equitable, cooperative, and creative solutions to both large and small scale problems
  • Reducing trauma related symptoms due to improved emotional intelligence and relational skills such as empathy, compassion, and self-awareness
  • Increasing holistic healing in order for the collective to live in a more aligned way

Play is the epitome of a thriving life. It is not just our birth right, it is the foundation of our expression and evolutionary process as humans. And I would say, that is no trivial matter indeed!

Want to Become A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches like Sharon ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

Building Confidence as a Life Coach
Learn the science behind how we cultivate self-confidence
Oct 15, 2021
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The Everything Life Coaching Podcast, featuring JRNI Coaching founders John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux, is a deep dive into the experience and business of being a life coach. In this episode, we talk about the science behind self-self-confidence, and techniques you can use to intentionally build it. Subscribe to get new episodes weekly!

Confidence Building Strategies for  Coaches

Confidence. Life coaches grapple with it. Our clients struggle with it. Managers want their employees to have more of it. Everywhere we turn, we’re encouraged to “have self-confidence!”

But what does it mean to be self-confident? 

According to the standard of flourishing held by applied positive psychology, self-confidence is widely considered to be a personality trait of a “happy” person. Simply put, to have self-confidence means you like and trust yourself.

Self-confidence consists of a specific set of psychological ingredients. It’s also influenced by the conditions around us. The core components of self-confidence include:

  • Optimism
  • Extroversion
  • Self-efficacy

As a life coach, it’s vital to feel confident in yourself and your abilities. It’s equally valuable to know how to help your coaching clients develop self-confidence in themselves. 

“When we work to build self-confidence, what we’re actually doing is giving ourselves the gift of self-love. Healthy self-confidence results in seeing yourself as kinder, more generous, ethical, intelligent, and whole.” - Noelle Cordeaux

Now here’s the great news: confidence and its associated traits are a muscle we can build! Self-confidence has been researched and quantified. Let’s take a look at the factors that build or enhance it, along with some self-confidence building exercises.

Conditions for Building Self-Confidence

1. Optimism

This is step one in building self-confidence as a life coach. Optimism itself is one of the core building blocks of resiliency. Here’s why it works:

  • Optimists believe they will experience good outcomes.
  • Optimists pat themselves on the back for a job well done.
  • When experiencing setbacks, optimists are less likely to personalize issues or see them as persistent problems that are likely to recur.

You can induce feelings of optimism and happiness with intention. Developing optimism starts with simply being aware of those times when you are dipping into a more negative outlook. 

One simple coaching intervention that works well when you or your client is stuck in a pessimistic state of mind is to perform a reframe. Brain research shows that it takes just 10-20 seconds of sustained focus on a positive thought to begin shifting mindset!

When you’re struggling with your self-confidence as a coach, cultivate positive thoughts about your work by considering this question: What are some outcomes of coaching that brought optimism when you were first starting out?

2. Extrovertism

Extroversion is the positive energy that is created by interacting with others, joining groups and helping other people feel at ease.

Extrovertism fun fact: You can fake it till you make it!

With intention, natural introverts can play with extroversion to experience the same positive benefits as their more extroverted counterparts. Even if it feels uncomfortable, challenging yourself to portray extroverted traits will garner positive results.

This is known as “optimism training” and is quite well known and very effective. It’s believed that the benefits of extroversion come in part from being distracted from our own problems when we interact with others, as well as the powerful impact of creating bonds and experiences with other people.

To expand your self-confidence through cultivating the qualities of extroversion, consider what traits or behaviors you can “try on”. A few to consider include: 

  • Hiring a public speaking coach to work on your online/video presence
  • Pitching and talking to anyone about what you do as a coach

3. Self-Efficacy

Self-efficacy is the cornerstone for building a foundation of lasting and valid self-confidence. Why? Because the experience of self-efficacy builds unshakable self esteem.

Self-efficacy is the belief that you already have what it takes to get something done, or that you can learn how to do it. It’s built and maintained based not on what we “think”, but from our real-world experiences. 

The two-step coaching process of experimentation and reflection is what ultimately leads to self trust. We practice this for ourselves as coaches, and also help our clients develop it for themselves as well.

Why it works:

  • In giving yourself positive experiences, it takes you out of your head and into the embodied experience of success. 
  • Building self-efficacy is a commitment to proving to yourself that even if you don’t know something, you are capable of learning and finding the tools to do the things that you want to do.  
  • Once you have proven to yourself in many different capacities that you can figure out and learn new things, you begin to take this fact for granted. This in turn builds a layer of natural self-confidence when approaching new situations or tasks. 

Sound at all familar? This is what life coaches do for our clients! We just have to remember to also apply it to ourselves.

Like optimism and extrovertism, self-efficacy is a muscle that you can build. To do so, there are four ingredients you’ll want to employ.

1) Role Models

Identify role models in your everyday life who demonstrate what you need to do to accomplish your goals. These can be people you know personally, or people who have already achieved what you want to learn or do. 

Pro-tip: one great way to gain direct insight into “how they do it” is to offer to pay an expert or colleague that you admire for an hour of their time. You can also take a course, read a book, attend a lecture, and ask questions in the coaching communities you are a part of.

2) Cheerleader

By having a supportive friend or accountability buddy in your corner, you will increase your belief in your own skills. This often leads to taking the healthy risks to grow or enhance your coaching practice that you might not otherwise try.

Your cheerleader must:

  • Be someone in your life who wholeheartedly believes in you.
  • Have earned your trust because their feedback is on-target and helpful. This cannot be someone who gives you gratuitous “yes” answers, or only tells you what you want to hear. 

3) Stress Management

Nothing zaps our self-confidence faster than being stuck in a state of chronic stress. Cultivating tools to navigate the stressors in your life can help you sidestep the inclination to allow self-doubt, bad moods or physical pain to keep you from doing your best.

When it comes to stress management, it’s important to remember that it’s not only events and difficult situations that hijack us, but other people as well. Toxic relationships damage the heart and your mind. Find ways to protect yourself from social stress and unhealthy relationships if you wish to flourish.  

For more resources on this topic, check out The Real Impact of Burnout and Stress.

4) Mastery Experiences

This is the most powerful way any of us can reduce self-doubt and build self-efficacy. Accumulating “wins” allows us to re-define who we are. To maximize its benefits, break a goal into small pieces that allow you to master several action steps along your way toward the larger accomplishment. 

Want to Be a Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our life coaches ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and self-self-confidence as a coach, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

Life Coaching
A Jedi Mind Trick for Managing Fear
Guest blog by Charlotte Winters
Oct 13, 2021
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Guest blog by Charlotte Winters

Coach Charlotte Winters

Charlotte Winters is an award-winning writer and life coach. For TV and film, she writes off-beat comedies and dramas featuring smart and sassy females in morally-ambiguous worlds. Having graduated Vassar with a BA in Theater and UCLA with an MFA in Screenwriting, Charlotte has written more than a dozen TV, film, and theater scripts and associate produced a History Channel show. 

She believes in goal-setting for creatives because, for her, setting and achieving goals isn’t so much about accomplishing tasks as it’s going on little adventures. She attributes her unique point of view to her upbringing; as a dual Danish-American citizen, she was raised by older, non-conventional parents in northern suburban New Jersey.

Charlotte is a 2021 graduate of the JRNI Coaching Intensive. You can follow her work on Instagram/Facebook @imcharlottewinters or by visiting

How I Discovered A Simple Process for Managing Fear

When I stepped off the Norwegian Airlines flight on that blazing July day in 2017, an already uncertain journey continued its next, most difficult leg. The sun seared my overstuffed navy duffel as we boarded the shuttle taking us to customs. The air-conditioning and a surface to lean on relieved me. But my throat remained parched. My head ached. 

I was scared. 

Coming from Copenhagen, I had gone through LAX customs many times before. In fact, I was coming home on this day to resume my Southern Californian life as a Hollywood freelancer. There was, however, a notable difference from previous trips. This time, I was tasked with managing my 91-year-old American expat father’s daily affairs... from 9,000 miles away. 

Nine months prior, my beloved Danish mother had passed away. After her unexpected death from leukemia/lymphoma, I had taken most of the year off to care for my frail father in his apartment. During this time, I learned everything I could about his options and what he needed on a daily basis. 

I created a plan in which we hired an in-home nurse to visit him several times a week, prepare his meals, do his laundry, manage his healthcare, and provide him company. Denmark being Denmark, he’d also receive daily visits from the municipality’s hjemmepleje (home healthcare workers), a Life Alert bracelet, and health care - all of which were free. The plan, for the most part, was solid and well thought-out. 

But anything could happen. 

Dad didn’t speak Danish. Prone to falls, he had broken his hip three months prior. And because my mother had done so much in the house, he even had trouble answering the phone (which he didn’t always hear). I knew there would be a lot to manage. And although we checked background records, we were putting an immense amount of trust into strangers’ hands. 

As I waited in line at the Enterprise rental counter (oh yeah, my Civic’s engine died while I was gone), I blinked back tears. My mind spun. Before my mother’s death, I had been successfully freelancing at Warner Bros. and tutoring. What if there was no work upon my return?

My brain served up two horrible options: 

  • I’d end up living in a cardboard box in Pacoima; or
  • I’d be heading back to a hostage situation in Denmark... only to fail to resolve it and then return to SoCal to live in my Pacoima box.

(Hey, I’m half-Danish, so when I go dark, I go DARK.)

I pulled myself together enough to rent a red Ford and drive home. And I made it. Encounter by encounter, circumstance by circumstance, I noticed that life clicked back into place. 

You know what? 

My fears didn’t come to pass. 

Within days, I was back to work at WB and had tutees. My Dad’s homecare plan didn’t just work out, it went gangbusters. We loved and trusted the in-home nurse so much that we practically adopted her into our family (and vice versa). 

In other words, nothing horrible happened! All of that mind drama in the LAX Enterprise rental car line was for naught!

So, What Did I Learn? 

After noticing my thought patterns for weeks, I began to recognize and manage my fear in three simple steps. Here they are:

Charlotte’s Jedi Mind Trick for Managing Fear

  1. Before you do something that raises your blood pressure, visualize the scenario of what you think is going to happen. Go all out. What’s the worst scenario that’s playing out? Write it down. 
  2. Then, complete that task and observe the details of what actually happens. Write that down. 
  3. Compare #1 to #2. 

You might laugh at what you find. 

Putting it Into Practice

If you hold many fears and anxieties, start with something small (and always use common sense). 

For instance, if you’re a newer coach afraid to find pro bono clients in Facebook groups, you may want to check the rules of that group first. If it’s all clear, then use the 3-step process when making your post. Getting responses isn’t as important as comparing what you think is going to happen to what actually does

Once posting in a Facebook group becomes no big deal, use this 3-step process to tackle a slightly bigger fear. And so on and so forth. 

Although useful, this exercise neither eradicates fear nor does it always prevent negative predictions from coming true. In our uncertain world, fear’s main purpose is to protect us. But if you haven’t already noticed, many hard things in life (i.e., global pandemics) are usually unexpected; we often can’t predict them. (I know, comforting, right?)

Experiencing the pain of the unexpected heightens our general anxiety level to create new false narratives in our heads.

When you can identify and bring these fears under control and see that, as Seneca noted, “we suffer more often in imagination than in reality,” you increase your capacity to serve more, give more, and be more in life. 

Want to Become A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches like Charlotte ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

Working “On” Vs “In” Your Coaching Business
Balancing what it takes to run a successful coaching business
Oct 8, 2021
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The Everything Life Coaching Podcast, featuring JRNI Coaching founders John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux, is a deep dive into the experience and business of being a life coach. In this episode, we explore the various hats we wear as coach-entrepreneurs, and how to balance running your business. Subscribe to get new episodes weekly!

The Reality of Entrepreneurship 

Not everyone is a natural born entrepreneur. In fact, we’d argue that such a human may not even exist! And while it’s true that some people may be more suited to self-employment than others, everyone has the capacity & potential to build a business. 

After working with thousands of aspiring life coaches, we’ve observed that there is often a gap between the idea of entrepreneurship, and the lived reality of it. So whatever preconceived notions you may hold about entrepreneurship, our advice is to throw them out the window!

Having unrealistic expectations can stop you from seeing the whole picture, and recognizing the opportunities as they come… even out of your perceived failures. In other words, to get your coaching practice off the ground, it helps to expect the unexpected. 

Working ‘ON’ vs ‘IN’ your business 

Our clients will typically only see the end result of our work: the actual service we sell. But in reality, there’s a lot more going on behind the scenes leading up to that one on one face time with your coaching clients. 

For most coach practitioners, working "ON" your business includes:

  • Business strategy and plan
  • Financial systems 
  • Client questionnaire forms and exercises
  • A website or other online presence
  • Filing systems
  • Organized home office space
  • A little cushion in the bank

Once you’ve got these fundamentals in place, then you are ready to press go and start working “IN” the business. That’s where you’re doing the things everyone thinks of when imagining what it's like to have a coaching business. "IN" the business includes delivering the actual services you provide:  1:1 coaching, programs, retreats, trainings, or whatever else you’re offering at this time.

For many new coaches, the ratio of time you'll spend "ON" versus "IN" your business may feel out of proportion. But don't worry, you're not doing it wrong! Spending 50% - 80% of your time "ON" the business isn't at all unusual... especially as you're getting started.

CEO and Worker Bee Modes

A metaphor that helps us understand the distinction between all the different ways you’ll be working “ON” your business is that of the CEO versus the Worker Bee. Both are important aspects of managing your business, along with the strategy, systems, and planning that keeps you moving forward.

CEO mode is when you’re looking into the future and thinking big.

This is where you vision and come up with ideas for new services, offerings, and programs. It’s creative and expansive. It’s also where you develop your long term plans, and how to execute them. 

Common CEO tasks include:

  • Strategy and planning: annual revenue forecast, budget, and workplan for the coming quarter or year.
  • Building your audience: tracking analytics, marketing & brand strategy, ideas for growing the business.  
  • Learning and growth: reading about new trends in coaching, taking classes in your area of specialty, networking with other coaches. 

Worker Bee Mode is about getting the day to day work done.

This is where you attend to the various aspects of running your business. It’s all the little things you do that make your coaching “pop”. 

Worker Bee tasks include:

  • Client check-ins. Following-up with current clients, and following through on new leads.
  • Financials. Preparing invoices and collecting payments, paying bills and tracking expenses. 
  • Content creation. Creating social media posts, website copy, blogging, podcasting, advertising, and developing program materials.
  • Client administration. This will look different for everyone. It might include uploading session recordings to DropBox, updating client notes, pulling together testimonials, or connecting with clients between sessions to share ideas and resources.

When it comes to running a coaching business, expect to spend time in both places. If you’re parked in CEO mode all the time, the day to day running of your business may grind to a halt. Likewise, if you get stuck in worker bee mode, you may hum along happily for a while… but your business is unlikely to grow. You need to be able to switch between the two: looking at the big picture, and then getting down into the work. 

Not Sure Where To Begin? Just Start Already

This is probably the single most important thing you can do. You can spend hours, days, weeks, months… and sometimes even years in “thinking” mode. Talking about your new business idea, but never actually getting it off the ground. 

It’s easy to get stuck in the weeds, procrastinating or write lists of all the things you should do before you can actually start. But at the end of the day, there are no excuses for not taking action. All successful businesses get built the same way: one task at a time. One day at a time. One client at a time.

The key is to show up, and keep on showing up. Set aside at least one day a month for CEO big picture thinking. Then take just one tangible action every day toward the coaching practice you hope to build.  Imagine where you'll be in one year's time if you do!

Ready to Become A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

The Business of Life Coaching
Ditch What Doesn’t Matter: Business Launch Tips for New Life Coaches
Guest blog by Sharon Bakcht
Oct 6, 2021
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Guest blog by Sharon Bakcht 

Sharon Bakcht

Sharon Bakcht is the Founder and Chief Badass of Being a BADASS. She most enjoys working with folks who want to move from doing what they are good at to doing what they ‘effing love. Through 1:1 Empowerment Coaching, Workshops, and Mastermind Groups, Sharon guides clients to listen to your voice, shed "the shoulds", and set badass boundaries so that you can LIVE YOUR TRUTH. 

Sharon is a New Yorker at heart, mom to a crazypants kid, and voracious donut-lover. She is a proud 2020 graduate of the JRNI Coaching Intensive. You can connect with her on Instagram @beingabadass or at

Ditch What Doesn't Matter... So You Can Do What Does

As a new coach are you totally overwhelmed by ALL the things? Is launching your business crazy-making? Yeah, it can be. 

You are so excited to hit the ground running because you love to coach and you kick ass at it. Yet the question of how to build your business has your stomach in knots and you’re spinning your wheels. 

I know because I was there.

Even though I have an MBA and 20+ years in corporate leadership - I’ve been where you’re at. It’s different when it’s YOUR business. It’s personal.

Being a coach is not the same as being an entrepreneur.

As Coachpreneurs, we have a lot of questions like:

  • How do I get clients? 
  • Should I build a website or go on social media? 
  • Do I create a workshop or coach 1:1? 
  • I’m putting myself out there, but is any of this working? 

The fears look like:

  • There are so many coaches out there. Maybe I should just do something else.
  • I don’t want to put myself out there.
  • I feel like an imposter.

Even well-meaning friends and family don’t really get what you’re going through as a new coach, trying to figure it all out - especially if you’re creating your own business.

There’s a lot of good advice for coaches out there - frankly, too much! It's overwhelming.

Every successful coach will tell you to do it their way. 

They all want to help. The problem is that they are not all saying the same thing. Build your business on Instagram. Start a Podcast. Use video. 

So who do we listen to?

I’m here to tell you to do it YOUR way. Don’t twist yourself into a pretzel trying to become a social influencer if that’s not your jam. And if it is, rock it! 

It’s time to put all the external voices on mute for a hot minute and listen to YOURS. 

  • What do you find energizing?
  • What lights you up?
  • How do you most enjoy connecting with people?

It's Time to Shed "the Shoulds"

We all have them:

  • I should have a website before I can tell people I’m a coach. 
  • I should be posting on social media every day.
  • I should give my coaching sessions away for free because I’m new at this.

If that last one hits home for you, I’m going to break my own rule and give you some advice here. You actually bring a lot to the table, even as a new coach, and this creates real value and impact on people. So shed that “should”, own your worth and charge accordingly.

These "Shoulds" are not helping you. They are clouding your judgment of what’s important. So ask yourself: Is this “Should” serving me? Is it truly something that I want to do? 

If not, bless and release, baby. As Elsa says, "let it go".

So to recap:

  1. Listen to your Voice
  2. Shed "the Shoulds"
  3. Ditch What Doesn’t Matter

How Do You Know WHAT to Ditch?

Read on to find out or check out this rad video:

1. The Fancy Website

You can start coaching without a website. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard, “I’ll start getting clients once my website is ready.” N to the O. You can build a beautiful, expensive, life-consuming website and still no one will see it. 

Websites are nice to have, but they are not a must. To get started, all you need is a way people can contact you. That’s it. Perhaps you want people to find you on social media. Or you can create a simple landing page where people can drop their email. Don’t over-engineer it. 

2. The Designer Logo

Sure, you could hire a graphic designer... if you’ve got cash to spare. But you don’t need to. Create a simple and professional logo for free. There are tools to make this easy like Canva or using Word Art in Google Drawing. Start with something simple; you can always evolve it later.

3. Being Vanilla

Resist the urge to be everything to everyone, for you will end up resonating with no one. I know that’s hard to do as a new coach. We don’t want to turn anyone off, especially if we feel desperate to get those first few clients. The problem with that logic is that you will turn no one on if your message is too watered down and unspecific.  

If someone tells you “I’m a life coach”, do you have any desire to work with them? Your eyes glaze over and you move onto the next thing. 

Try something like “I help people-pleasers and empaths to listen to your voice and set empowered boundaries so that you can LIVE YOUR TRUTH.” That’s either going to strike gold or strike out. 

And that’s exactly what you want.

It’s good to turn some people off. Someone else can help them. You want to polarize so that the people who are YOUR people will actually hear your message and get it. Getting specific on your coaching niche will deliver.

4. What Drains You

Pay attention to your energy. If it doesn’t energize you, don’t do it. Pivot to a different offering or outsource if needed. Take social media for example. I find it super draining. So I’m not on it very much, and I get help with some aspects of it from experts that love doing it. 

5. Comparison

We can go down the rabbit hole of how everyone else is doing it. STOP! Sure we can learn from others but when that comparison turns into negative self-talk, it’s time to nip that in the bud. Comparison can be a huge distraction and time sink.

YOU are YOU and they are them. The world needs YOUR voice. Period.

6. Self Judgment + Imposter Syndrome

If you question your worth and the value of your offering, it will get in the way of your business. 

If this feels like you, prioritize doing the work on yourself NOW. It’s time to address your demons of self worth, self value and any issues you have with money. I’m not saying you have to be perfect to be a coach. Not in the least. I’m saying we need to work on our stuff so that we can build the businesses of our dreams. I promise you, this will pay back in spades. 

7. Saying YES when it’s really a NO

If something feels like a NO - if it feels misaligned with your truth - be it a client, an offering or a marketing approach, be 100% honest with yourself. 

Ditch the FOMO (fear of missing out). Saying NO will help you focus on where you want to say YES! So you can show up authentically, aligned and fully in your truth. Damn, that’s attractive, isn’t it?

So, are you ready to Listen to YOUR Voice?

Is it time to Shed "the Shoulds"? What’s one thing you are going to ditch today so you can do what matters? I’d love to know.

If you want more guidance to fight the overwhelm and get focused on what will really move the needle for YOU, let's talk about 1:1 Coaching Mentorship and the BADASS Mastermind for New Coachpreneurs. 

You got this, Badass!

Want to Become A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches like Sharon ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

Dismantling Ideas We All Have About Money
Replacing the American Dream with a more expansive view of success
Oct 1, 2021
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The Everything Life Coaching Podcast, featuring JRNI Coaching founders John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux, is a deep dive into the experience and business of being a life coach. In this episode, we explore the real cost of chasing the American Dream, and what contributes to lasting happiness instead. Subscribe to get new episodes weekly!

It's Time to Redefine Success

“Having relational currency is becoming more important than money.” - Noelle Cordeaux

The research findings are clear and unequivocal: the pursuit of money isn’t giving us what we need as human beings. Capitalism may be the dominant operating system for our society, but the life outcomes people are looking for today are changing. 

Or, perhaps we’re simply reaching back to what they always were. 

If the history of human existence was squeezed into a single day, the Industrial Revolution didn’t take place until midnight! For the vast majority of our history, we lived and worked within smaller, more interconnected communities.

Contrast this with how many people are living in modern society: isolated, disconnected, and living paycheck to paycheck. Never enough time. Striving to get ahead. 

As coaches, we understand that human beings are wired for connection. But we also grapple with the gap between what humans need, and what many of our clients are actually experiencing.

Like it or not, society has taught us the majority of what we believe about money. We’re bombarded from birth with consumer culture messages and imagery designed to show us what “success” looks like. 

There’s a great deal of pressure upon us to produce and achieve. It’s emblematic of the American dream - to build a personal empire as the result of our individual labor. 

The problem we face is that the American Dream is a narrowly defined path. The standards of this ideal are defined by whiteness and western versions of masculinity. It demands an acceptance of prescribed roles, the accumulation of resources, and an exhibition of wealth. 

We’re all influenced by this ideal, but it’s a game that few can win.

Hallmarks of our culture’s ideal of “success” include:

  • Home ownership, marriage, and children
  • Possessions that display our prosperity 
  • Immigrants must assimilate
  • Women must “lean in” and function in step with a hierarchical patriarchy
  • Queer people must marry
  • People of color must code switch 

Whether we consciously agree with the dominant paradigm or not, we’ve all been socialized to it. And when we put our heads down and strive for our personal slice of the “American Dream”, it creates barriers to intimacy and connection. 

It’s difficult to be fully present when we’re constantly chasing more, more, more. It’s also hard to ever fully experience that elusive thing we’re chasing: happiness.

In 2018, a Signa survey found that 25% of people in the United States don’t believe there is anyone in their life who understands them. Only 50% feel they have meaningful interactions with other people every day. 

After the enforced separation that’s come with the pandemic, this acute sense of isolation has only grown more pronounced.

The American Dream itself pits individuals against one another. In the name of market maximization over community, we’re fed a narrative that "getting ahead in life" is a race that we all must run. Instead of collaboration, we’re living inside a system that puts us in direct competition. 

If we don’t outperform someone else, we lose.  

Toxic individualism is emotionally draining. It also does damage to our physical health. Studies have shown that loneliness increases our risk of heart disease, stroke and dementia. Loneliness also makes us more hostile toward other people.

Systems lose their power when we don’t buy into them. 

While shifting an entire system takes time, there are things we can do that aren’t all that complicated. It begins by challenging our notion of success. 

We all need social capital (people we can rely on) in order to experience enough psychological safety and positive emotions to flourish in life. And when we seek strong relationships instead of wealth, the outcomes are clear: we’re happier.  

“Notions like trust, state capacity, community-building, social cohesion, and social values like empathy and altruism are now seen as a prerequisite for prosperity and welfare.” - Global Wellness Summit

In an attempt to measure and quantify what actually brings us satisfaction in life, a great deal of research has been done over the past several decades. One of the most well known of these studies has been going for 80 years, and comes out of Harvard University. Here’s what they've learned after following participants for a lifetime:  

  • Relationships with family, friends, and community delay mental and physical decline.
  • Our social ties are better predictors of our happiness and longevity than social class, IQ, or genetics.

Last year, the job website Indeed designed research to explore how people thrive at work. The most striking revelation, published in this year’s U.N. World Happiness Report, is that although people think being paid well is the most important driver of being happy at work, it’s not.  Belonging is the most important contributor to our professional happiness, by a long shot.

It’s not our worldly achievements but our close relationships that most contribute to flourishing, happiness and sustenance. 

Episode references:

Ready to Follow YOUR Dream?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

The Business of Life Coaching
6 Things Every Life Coach Business Website Needs
Get a professional website up and running with our comprehensive guide
Oct 7, 2021
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When it’s time to set up shop as a life coach, it’s important to have a digital home for your coaching business.

In this article, we’ll guide you through the essentials:

  • The basics of setting up a website
  • The 6 core ingredients your coaching website should include
  • How to tackle the “About Me” page 

But first, let's talk about why you might want to make the investment of time and resources in the first place.

Sure, a Facebook page or Instagram account can be a great place to establish your presence as you're getting started. And for some coaches, this may be all they want or need. But what happens when potential clients want to learn more, or are ready to book a session with you? Those back and forth DM’s can quickly add to your workload!

Here's another factor to consider: unlike social media sites, a website belongs entirely to you. You own your content and user experience. The algorithms don't change overnight, and there’s no daily pressure to manage comments and engagement. 

Even something as simple as one page website can help you establish three must-have's for your coaching practice: Visibility, Credibility, Efficiency.

An effective website offers coaching clients an easy way to check you out, learn what you provide, and book a session. And rest assured, creating a great website doesn’t have to break the bank - or your brain!

How Do You Set Up A Life Coaching Website?

Select A Domain Name

The first decision you need to make is what you’ll call your site. If you’ve got an uncommon first and last name, that’s an obvious place to start. You might also have a name for your coaching business in mind, and that’s solid way to go too. Either way, begin with a couple options and do your homework. 

To find out if the domain name you want is available, there are many free online tools for doing so. They include, GoDaddy, Shopify, and others. Many website hosts will also provide this service as you begin the process of building a site.

Consider System Integrations

An effective website should help make your life easier. If you don’t already have an online booking system, email marketing tool, and payment processor lined up, consider it now! This is the ideal time to set them up if you intend to use them. 

To make a potential client’s experience on your site seamless, consider which systems integrate with the website platform you want to use. If you currently have systems in place that you love, make sure that host site can play nicely with tools you’re already using.

Some web hosting platforms also offer payment processors and email marketing tools too. If you're just getting started, check out what they offer to see if it meets your needs and budget.

For more information on selecting your coaching business systems, check out our comprehensive guide - Tools of the Trade: Resources To Jump Start Your Coaching Practice.

Choose A Host Platform

Regardless of your current level of tech knowledge and comfort, there’s a platform out there for you! A few popular ones for designing and hosting websites include Squarespace, Wix, and WordPress. With the variety of user-friendly templates now being offered by host sites, just about anyone can construct a basic website in an afternoon.

For more sophisticated features, such as embedded payment processors and integration with your social media feeds, you can DIY this if you are comfortable rolling up your sleeves and digging into the back end of your site. If you’re less tech-savvy, or just want to devote more of your time to coaching and content creation, consult with a web designer.

Hiring a Support Team

Successful solopreneurs know when to delegate! If web design isn’t your jam, you may decide to hire out some of these tasks. If so, there are small business professionals who help people just like you. You don't need to spend a fortune to achieve the look, feel, and final “web home” that you are after.


A web designer can take care of building your site, and will often have expertise in graphic design and branding. Many can even help design your coaching business logo if you need one. There are designers who specialize in working with life coaches and wellness professionals, and many offer budget-friendly services. 


If writing isn’t your forte, you can contract with a copywriter to develop your website content. There are experts out there who will take your story and services, and spin them into copy that resonates for your ideal client.

When deciding who to hire, your best leads are likely to be found by word of mouth. Find other coaches in your community whose sites you like, and ask who designed them. If they hired out the work and are pleased with the result, get a referral!

What Should A Coaching Website Include?

Whether you intend to start out with just a landing page, or plan to build a multi-page site, your website content should include the following: 

  • Homepage
  • Who you are
  • Your prospective coaching clients’ struggles - and the solution you offer
  • Your services
  • A sample of what it’s like to work with you  
  • How to hire you


This is your online business card, and you’ll want it to make an impression. In real estate terms, what you want to create with your site is some curb appeal! The homepage is your front door. It's where you set the tone, establish your credibility, and convey your unique personality and style.

As you think about your website messaging, mentally dial into what you know about the potential clients that you’re hoping to reach. If you’re lighthearted and irreverent, let the tone of your site reflect that. If you work with executives, a more conservative look and feel might be appropriate.

Consider what YOU find compelling. Your ideal clients are likely to feel the same.

Who You Are

When it comes to choosing a life coach, people pick who to work with based on who they relate with and feel connected to. Translation? You'll need to share a little somthing about yourself. With that said, there’s no need to write an autobiography! For a single-page site, the biographical element might just be one paragraph and a photo. 

Many coaches wrestle with how best to tell their story. If you're wondering how much to say about yourself - and how to do it most effectively - you're not alone! We’ll dive deeper into this element in the “About Me” section below.

The Problem, and Your Solution

The ultimate purpose of your coaching website content is sales. For this reason, it’s important to clearly tell potential coaching clients exactly what you do. You should be able to speak clearly to their pain points, and demonstrate how your services can help them. 

Nobody hires a life coach - they pay for solutions. This is where your coaching niche comes into play. You can coach outside your niche, change specialties, and evolve your practice over time. But having a clear focus for your website messaging at every phase of your journey is the most effective way to attract new coaching clients.

Need help articulating your value proposition? Check out: Don’t “Sell” Life Coaching (Or Your 'Story') - Offer Solutions Instead

Your Services

How can clients work with you? Make sure you lay out the options! 1:1 coaching, group programs, classes, retreats, a podcast or publications… whatever you’ve got, include it. If you offer a high ticket coaching program, you’ll likely want a signature sales page dedicated to it as well.

There are different schools of thought regarding whether or not to list your pricing directly on your website. Both approaches can work. The decision will depend on what kind of services you offer and your client base. How you approach this should align with your larger sales philosophy and strategy.

A Sampling of Your Work

Hiring a life coach can be a major investment. Show your potential clients it will be worth their while to invest with you!

There are a number of ways to do this, including:

  • Client testimonials 
  • A giveaway that offers value such as an ebook, masterclass, or tool
  • A blog or podcast that showcases your perspective or expertise
  • Complementary 30-60 minute exploratory call for prospective clients

If you’re just getting started, there are creative ways to approach some of this as you grow. Add just one new blog post a month, and within a year you’ll have a nice back catalogue of website content built up. Consider doing some pro-bono coaching sessions to collect those first few positive testimonials for your new site. Remember to get permission from the client, including whether or not you may publish their full name!

How to Hire You!

At minimum, your site should include an easy way to contact you. The best option for this is to use an embedded online form that the visitor can fill out on your site. Pro tip: posting your email address, phone number, or other information directly on your site isn’t something we’d recommend. Spammers use bots to troll the internet and harvest contact information, blasting inboxes forever-after with junk emails.

If you have an online calendaring system in place, consider including an integrated booking system on your website. It's an efficient way for potential coaching clients to schedule an initial consultation with you. Likewise, if you plan to sell products such as on-demand classes or an ebook, you’ll want to make those transactions easy for your clients.

Tackling the Life Coach “About Me” Page

You’ve likely heard that your story helps to attract your ideal clients. And it does, but only up to a point.

Your story is what led you to become a coach, and helps to demonstrate expertise and credibility within your scope of practice. It also helps to create a sense of ease and familiarity with your style, personality, values and philosophy.

But storytelling isn't quite the same as selling your coaching services. What you tell, and how you say it, is done for a specific purpose.

Your story is a marketing tool. From a business point of view, your story functions like a mirror, reflecting back the dreams your prospective client holds for themselves.

  • If you’re thriving after divorce… that's what THEY want.
  • If you’ve found a great balance between work, family, and self care… that's what THEY want.
  • If you climbed the corporate ladder of success… that's what THEY want.

Your ideal clients are drawn both to your unique style, and to the RESULTS you have achieved. Those results are what telling your story is meant to illustrate. Why? Because these are the same results your ideal client is hungry for in their own life.

Storytelling Framework

To craft a compelling About Me page, find the intersection between your story, what the client wants, and the services you offer as a coach. It’s as simple as 1-2-3:

  1. Work backwards from your client value proposition: “I help _____ with ______.” Example: “I help newly divorced women to reclaim their joy.”
  2. Now identify your plot twist: Something you overcame, discovered, or experienced that relates to your value proposition. In the example above, that would likely be your own post-divorce rebirth process.
  3. Next tie in your WHY: How did this experience lead you to become a coach? What expertise do you offer to others who are now walking a similar path?

Coaching requires vulnerability on the part of the client. It also requires some vulnerability from you in return. Prospective clients want to know you’re a safe place to share their stories, dreams, and fears. Sharing a bit about where you’ve been in life makes you both relatable and credible as a coach. And rest assured, you don’t have to divulge all your personal details in order to make an authentic connection.

Need more resources on how to tell your story as a coach? We’ve got you covered with The Right Way to Let Your Story Lead Your Life Coaching Practice.

Ready for Liftoff?

Coaching is a rapidly growing field that is continuously evolving. Even for seasoned coaches, there’s always more to discover. If you’ve not already earned your ICF coaching certification, there’s no better time than now to get started! Come check out JRNI Life Coach Training - a program that's every bit as unique as you are. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, business instruction to prepare you for liftoff as an entrepreneur, and fellow students dedicated to becoming a collective force for good.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

How To Build A Coaching Culture At Work
Managers must shift from "command and control" to a coaching mindset
Sep 24, 2021
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The Everything Life Coaching Podcast, featuring JRNI Coaching founders John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux, is a deep dive into the experience and business of being a life coach. In this episode, we’re exploring the difference between “command and control” leadership and management that’s informed by a coaching mindset. Subscribe to get new episodes weekly!

Have you ever felt micromanaged, over-directed, or controlled in the workplace? Many traditional businesses are run with an iron fist, revolving around a “Do what I say” management philosophy. Command and control leadership is familiar to most of us: decisive, authoritative, and top down. It’s also (thankfully) going out of style.

If there’s one thing we’ve learned from the disruption to “business as usual” caused by the pandemic, it’s that work doesn’t have to be this way. Telling people when to show up, precisely how to complete a task, or what time to take lunch is just the tip of the iceberg. 

Employees are increasingly demanding to be treated like adults at work, with more decision making authority, flexibility, and opportunities for creativity. They also recognize that the bright line between “work” and “life” is often an illusion in our 24-hour wired culture, and want to be met in their full humanity in the workplace.

“In the face of rapid, disruptive change, companies are realizing that managers can’t be expected to have all the answers and that command-and-control leadership is no longer viable. As a result, many firms are moving toward a coaching model in which managers facilitate problem solving and encourage employees’ development by asking questions and offering support and guidance rather than giving orders and making judgments.” - Harvard Business Review, The Leader As Coach

The idea of training managers and leaders in coaching principles is relatively new. It’s only in the last few years that research in this area has really begun to take off.

Heavy hitting human resource firms such as Gartner, academics like the Harvard Business Review, and publications such as the New York Times and Wall Street Journal have all been calling for coaching skills to supplement (or replace!) hierarchical management practices as we know them today. 

According to Brian Kropp, chief of human resources research at Gartner, management of the future will require less technical experts, and more social-emotional expertise. 

So what does that mean? 

We have a lot yet to discover about what this can look like. What we know for sure is that our current situation isn’t working. 

Right now, if someone is good at their job the reward is often a promotion into management. However, when a skilled individual contributor moves into a leadership role, there is usually very little training provided. Instead, most new managers are expected to magically develop the soft skills and Emotional I.Q. necessary to empathize, motivate, inspire, and lead teams of their fellow humans.

As anyone who's worked for a difficult boss knows, technical savvy doesn't seamlessly translate into effective leadership!

Managers who are trained as coaches are able to create psychological safety for others, and draw out the unique talents from each member of their team, But here’s the rub: if you were to ask the managers and leaders that you know if they are able to do this… more than a few of them would probably say yes (even if that's not actually the case!)

Many leaders sincerely believe they are coaching their staff, but what you’re likely to find when you take a closer look at their “coaching” is something quite different. What managers are often doing instead is giving advice.

Advising provides answers, which in effect shapes behavior. It’s different from coaching, which supports employees in finding their own solutions and developing self-efficacy at work. 

Many managers can learn to make this shift in thinking in a relatively short amount of time, but most will need some actual training in order to do so!

Here at JRNI Coaching, a large percentage of our students come from business and industry backgrounds. Many attend coach training not out of a desire to leave their current careers and become full time coaches, but to enhance their skills as leaders and managers where they're at. They train with us in order to level-up in their existing career by bringing a coaching philosophy and frameworks back to the office.

Benefits of A Coaching Mindset

So what does this look like in practical terms? Let’s take a look at several classes of employees, and what they gain from approaching their work through a coaching lens.

New Managers

  • Empowering a team versus micromanaging, or taking on all the work 
  • Communication skills to foster collaboration and feedback
  • Self-awareness and empathy building 
  • Developing vision for long term strategy versus putting out fires

Check out this handy guide to support new managers from Harvard Business Review

Mid-Level Managers Destined for Greatness

  • Playing to strengths: assessing the unique talents of individuals to customize team roles in order to create autonomy and ownership
  • Understanding the importance of both recognition and triggers
  • Creating psychological safety
  • Asking the right questions and capitalizing on talent

Here’s a guide from Harvard Business Review to support managers who want to level UP

Executive Leadership

  • Directing the attention of others as well as harnessing your own
  • Holding a concurrent view of the self, others and the wider world
  • Mastering self-awareness and self-control
  • Mastering the use of empathy and relationship management

Check out this Harvard Business Review Guide for harnessing focus as a leader.  

From Theory to Practice

There's a big difference between showing a management team the great (and they are really great!) Harvard Business Review Guides listed above, and actually GETTING those results. That difference lies in training and ongoing professional development. 

In order for new managerial behaviors to take root, people need safe ways to practice, make mistakes, and learn. It’s not enough to read an article and have an “aha moment”. To impement on those good intentions, managers must be fully supported and resourced to  make the behavioral shifts that adopting a coaching mindset requires.

A true coaching culture is one in which managers and leaders receive the coaching that THEY need to in turn become effective coaches for their staff.

Ready to Level Up?

People enroll in our coach training program for a variety of reasons. Some come with the clear intention to build a career in life coaching. But not all plan to “go pro”. Many of our students seek to apply coaching skills to roles they may already be playing - as business owners, managers, advisors, human resource specialists, therapists, personal trainers and career mentors. Sound like you? If you'd like to learn more, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

Life Coaching
Coaching for Lasting Change: The Power of Daily Habits
A 5-step process to help clients rewire a habit loop
Sep 23, 2021
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Life Coaching
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Did you know that more than half the decisions we make each day happen on “auto-pilot”? It’s true! Studies conducted by neurobiologists, cognitive psychologists and others have shown that anywhere between 40% to a whopping 90% of human behavior is habitual.

What we think, feel, and do each day is directed by our subconscious far more often than we realize. 

From brushing our teeth to driving to the grocery store, we’re often not “all there”... and that's by design. Through repetition, our brain creates shortcuts - automatic responses developed over time as a result of associated learning. This is what allows us to move through many activities of daily life without having to really think about them.

The good news is that this is a very efficient system designed to save brainpower for what really matters. But when it comes to making a habit change, this energy-saving trick of the mind is often what trips us up.

Why We Get Stuck In Old Habits

To reach our goals, it’s often necessary to examine and change our habits. But for most of us, changing an established behavior can be incredibly difficult. 

But WHY is it so hard to swap out a bad habit for a better one? That’s what MIT professor Ann M. Graybiel wanted to know, so she studied it. 

“I have become fascinated with habits and rituals — and with trying to understand the neurobiology that underlies these behaviors of ours. Our habits are so familiar to us, so common in our lives, that for many of the little habits and mannerisms that we have, we almost are unaware that we are doing them — from morning routines to evening routines.” - Ann Graybiel

What Graybiel and her team of MIT researchers found has helped to shape our understanding of how the human brain works. Our behaviors really do get wired in, like well worn trails inside our brain. This is why it can take a lot of effort to implement behavioral changes!

To change, we have to mentally resist the impulse to follow a familiar route. Instead, our brain is bushwacking a new trail through the grey matter!

Change a Habit, Change Your Life

In his book The Power of Habit, author Charles Duhigg explains the Habit Loop that was discovered by the folks at MIT, and how to disrupt it step by step. Let's take a brief look at how the science of habit change works.

How to Rewire A Habit Loop:

  • Identify: What lifestyle changes would you like to make?
  • Cue: What sets the behavior/pattern in motion?
  • Reward: What are you getting out of it?
  • Experiment: What else might satisfy that craving/desire?
  • Isolate: What’s going on that leads to the cue/craving/impulse?
  • Plan: Disrupt the pattern with a new response

This change model is just one among many. But whichever you use, they all require the same essential ingredient: AWARENESS. This is the foundation for all conscious decision making.

As coaches, this is precisely what we’re here to help people with. To that end, an important aspect of our work is understanding how to identify the unconscious habits and patterns that may be getting in the client’s way. From there, we’re better able to guide clients in developing new habits (or breaking old ones!) by bringing research-based tools, structure, and accountability to the table… core ingredients that drive meaningful lifestyle changes.

Coaching Example

Let’s take weight loss as just one example of how Duhigg's 5-Step process works. Using motivational interviewing, we can walk the client through it.


Invite your client to find just one habit that isn’t supporting their goal. Maybe they routinely eat Doritos at lunch. Or snooze through the alarm and skip their morning workout more days than they’d like to admit. 

No self judgement here! At this point, it can be helpful to reassure the client that we all have habits that don’t serve us. The important thing is to simply begin with an awareness of what they would like to change, and why.


We get something out of our behaviors, even the ones we consider “bad”. Taking the time to figure out what the reward is before attempting to disrupt a habit can be useful. In the case of the snooze alarm, the reward might be that snuggly feeling they get nestled under the covers half awake… which may feel a lot more rewarding in the moment than the long-term payoff of getting up and putting your gym clothes on!


Try to pinpoint what catalyzes the default decision to follow a particular habit loop. Where does that choice get made, and why? Usually it can be traced to one of the following: 

  • Location
  • Time
  • Current emotional state
  • People around you
  • Your last action


This is where the client can begin to come up with ideas about how they might like to respond to the cue in a new way going forward. As a coach, you could ask:

  • How can you interrupt just one habit and replace it with a new one? 
  • What new behavior will better support your goal? 
  • What will it take for you to consciously implement it?


This is where you and your client get to play detective, looking more deeply at the context surrounding the habit. This can help them to arrive at a better understanding of what’s making it so darn sticky. 

  • For the Dorito-lover, perhaps they don’t eat breakfast and arrive at lunchtime feeling too ravenous to make healthier choices. 
  • If the snooze alarm is a problem, it could be that they routinely go to bed too late (yet another habit loop!) and don’t feel rested when the alarm goes off.


Here’s where the rubber meets the road. You’ve taken a look at what needs to change, what makes the habit sticky, and how your client might like to do things differently. Now it’s time to turn insight into action, which is what life coaching is all about!

It can be helpful for some people in the initial stages of change to divide things up into bite sized chunks. Consider setting up a series of small wins that can help disrupt the old pattern while laying a foundation for the desired new habit. 

Let’s take the snooze alarm artist as an example.

If their real goal is to get to the gym in the morning, here’s one way habit change can happen as a series of smaller steps:

  1. Adjust the bedtime routine. Decide how many hours of sleep are optimal, and work backwards. If they need 7 hours of sleep to feel rested, and they want to be up by 6:30 am to hit the gym, the first experiment is to build a new habit: be in bed by 11 pm.
  1. Build in the “reward”. If part of the snooze alarm appeal is resting inside that cozy half-awake space for a little while before getting up, consider building one snooze into the wakeup time. If they need to be out of bed by 6:30, the next new habit is to set the alarm for 6:15.
  1. Hit the gym… once. If the ultimate goal is to be at the gym 3 mornings each week, but that’s not happened in months, perhaps a goal of doing it once or twice a week in the initial stages could be the victory. Remember: to build a new habit, we're aiming for progress over perfection.

One way we help our clients achieve greater levels of self efficacy is by setting them up to achieve small wins as they make their way toward a larger goal. When we break down a project into bite-sized chunks, we’re building momentum. And as the client logs a series of positive experiences over time, it strengthens the belief that they can take on even bigger challenges.  

Want to Be A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in the science of positive psychology, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

Manifestation Techniques for Men: Feeling Your Way Into A Daily Practice
Guest blog by Coach Joe Longo
Sep 22, 2021
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Guest blog by Joe Longo

Joe Longo

From college football player to a photographer to an executive-level manager at the university level to a self-employed creative to an intuitive manifestation coach - it’s safe to say Joe Longo has lived many lives. It's these real-world experiences that pushed him to study with JRNI, and dive into an evidence-based coaching style using Positive Psychology, mindfulness, and the power of intention and practice to create our best life and achieve our goals.

A 2020 graduate of the JRNI Coach Training program, Joe is focused on helping others find the LIGHT WITHIN and help awaken a deep desire and passion to live with a sense of purpose for something greater than yourself. Alongside his life coaching practice, Joe is also a freelance photographer, and a yoga and meditation teacher focused on manifestation and mindset. You can follow his work on Instagram @inspirecreatemanifest, TikTok, or by visiting website

Manifestation Techniques for Men

“Feeling a state produces that state.” ― Neville Goddard

When we look at this quote we can easily get all the fuzzy feelings and think: “All I need to do is feel and I can create that state of what I want!” But for most men, we have been told not to feel, to suppress our feelings. The messages we’ve received are to be strong, that men don't cry, and to just suck it up and keep going. 

A couple of weeks ago I held a Men's Manifestation information night as a way to connect with men and inquire about the struggles they may have with goal setting, manifesting, and creating a daily practice to support them on their journey. 

Some of the things that came to the surface included:

  1. Men are taught that anger is one of the only feelings we are free to express. 
  2. Crying is weak... unless you are crying over a sporting event. 
  3. Asking for help is a sign of weakness.
  4. Most men have very broad goals such as financial freedom, family security, free time with family, friends, and loved ones, and job advancement.  

As we dive into the teachings of Neville Goddard (author of The Feeling is the Secret)  and Napoleon Hill (Think and Grow Rich), we discover that a person must feel as if your wish has already been fulfilled to allow that manifestation to come to life. So how do we do that?

When it comes to manifestations, you need to be specific.

You need to put a timeline on your goals, then find a balance between letting go and allowing, and putting in the inspired action to bring it all to life. You need to be grateful and enjoy the journey, and move into the feeling of the wish already being fulfilled.

What I've discovered in my work is that many men are starting from a place of low vibration, typically from a space of anger. We’re talking about feelings like:

  • I hate my job
  • I hate my boss
  • I want to punch my whole office in the nose! 

If we are spending most of our time in anger, guess what we are attracting? MORE ANGER! 

We are energy, in constant motion vibrating with our emotions and feelings. David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D. developed a Map of Consciousness, which presents a diagram of vibrational states of being in his book Power vs. Force. Most men are in the force or hyperactivity area of the Map of Consciousness that can lead us to try too hard, which in turn has a way of blocking everything we actually want. 

So how do we as men move from force into power, happiness, and productivity... ascending up the Map of Consciousness?

Start small! 

You don't have to give up sports, or beers and wings with friends. Instead, we start by bringing more awareness to the present moment. That usually begins by developing a daily practice of mindfulness to support you.  

What does a “daily practice” look like? 

1) Sleep

You're not a stronger man if you only sleep 3 hours a night. Your body needs rest to function at peak performance. The average adult needs between 7-9 hours of sleep each night to be at our best. For most of us, it means that anything less puts us in a deficit before the day even begins. If we go to bed and wake up at the same time every day, we can reinforce the circadian rhythm which will in turn make going to sleep at the same time easier. This helps ensure that we are ready for the day. 

2) Meditation / Breathwork

We are learning more and more every day about the power of the breath and the benefits of meditation. You don’t need to sit cross-legged on a pillow for 30 minutes every morning to get the benefits. A 2-5 minute daily practice is  a fine way to start.

3) Journal

Take 5 minutes every morning to check in with yourself in writing. Ask yourself: who do I need to show up for today? How do I need to show up for myself? Then move into gratitude for the day, and make note of all that you have. Every night look back on your day with gratitude for all you learned and accomplished and be kind to yourself.

4) Inspiration

Give yourself 5-10 minutes of inspiring content in the morning. This could be from a book, podcast, YouTube video, or other source. Anything that will give you a shot of inspiration for the day.  

Give it a try for 7 days.

Notice how you feel when you start the day off with an intentional morning practice.

Pressed for time? The entire thing can take less than 15 minutes if that’s all you have. Whether it’s ten minutes or an hour, give what you can. With each day you’ll discover more about yourself, which will allow you to get more specific with whatever it is that you want for yourself in this life. It all starts with giving yourself time to know yourself, and your feelings. 

Want a partner in the process of setting up a daily practice? Join me for a Zoom Night for Men on September 28th at 8pm EST. REGISTER HERE 

Ready To Be A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches like Joe ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

What are Restorative Practices and How Do We Use Them?
Applying principles of social justice to your coaching practice
Sep 17, 2021
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The Everything Life Coaching Podcast, featuring JRNI Coaching founders John Kim and Noelle Cordeaux, is a deep dive into the experience and business of being a life coach. In this episode, we’re exploring the intersection between social sciences and coaching, and how we can use restorative practices to repair harm and deepen connection between individuals and groups. Subscribe to get new episodes weekly!

“Restorative practice” has become something of a buzzword coming out of the pandemic. From stark examples of racial inequity and social injustice, to the struggle of parents and small businesses to keep their heads above water, a spotlight has been turned onto many aspects of our society that aren’t OK. More people than ever before are speaking out, calling for change.

So where does the concept of restorative practice come in, what does it entail, and how might these tools relate to the practice of coaching?

“When I think about the word “restorative”, what comes to my mind is healing.” - John Kim

What Coaches Need to Know 

The idea of restorative practices comes to us from the social sciences, and seeks to address what we need as humans in order to thrive in community with one another. It’s a collaborative process designed to repair harm at the individual or communal level.

At its core, restorative practices offer us practical skills for taking individual responsibility for our behavior and its impact, while remaining connected to one another.

Restorative practices have been used for a long time in schools and social justice work for the purpose of keeping families and communities intact, and for building rituals around inclusion so that every person inside a group has a voice. The skills associated with restorative practices help people build stronger connections through participating in learning, decision making, inclusion, conflict management, repair and empowerment.

According to the International Institute for Restorative Practices, these processes ultimately help to:

  • Reduce crime, violence and bullying
  • Improve human behavior
  • Strengthen civil society
  • Provide effective leadership
  • Restore relationships
  • Repair harm

One really cool example of how this is playing out on the societal level is in Ireland. That’s right - the Island of Ireland has declared itself a restorative society, one that believes in and integrates restorative practices as a way of building and maintaining relationships, which enable health and wellbeing!

Restorative Practices and the Coaching Profession

Coaches are in a great position to support those who’d like to learn about and engage with restorative practices. It can be an especially powerful model to adopt when thinking about how a coaching client is experiencing harm in their own life, and what steps might be taken to resolve the situation effectively. It's also a great set of principles to embody in every aspect of lives.

The core tenants of restorative practices and ethical coaching are closely aligned. Many restorative practices have indiginous roots, and can serve us in every aspect of our lives in society. 

Essential restorative skills include: 

  • Appropriate body language 
  • Non-judgement
  • Emotional awareness/self-awareness
  • Listening with empathy 
  • Listening for feelings and needs 
  • Reviewing and modelling good practice
  • Restorative conflict management/resolution  
  • Restorative conversations/language use

The Five R’s of Restorative Practice

The five R’s are widely used as a coaching framework for effectively doing this work. What follows comes from The Conflict Center, a nonprofit organization supported by the University of Denver. These principles are not "new" - they are drawn from indigenous wisdom about how to be in right relationship.

1. Relationship

At the heart of every restorative process is a hurt relationship. Without positive relationships, it becomes more difficult for people to lead fulfilling lives. The person or organization that caused harm has negatively impacted the lives of real people and a real group or system. Once the person who caused harm becomes accountable for their actions and begins to make amends, the relationship can start to heal. 

2. Respect

If relationships are at the heart of restorative practice, respect is the key ingredient. Respect keeps the process safe. All involved parties are asked and then trusted to show respect for themselves and for others at all stages of the process. Participants employ deep listening, where instead of assuming we know what the other speaker is about to say, we focus instead on what they are actually saying. Even if we disagree with their thinking, we try to understand their perspective.

3. Responsibility

In order for restorative practice to be effective, everyone must grapple with their own personal responsibility. Participants must be honest with themselves and search deeply in their hearts to discover how they might have had a hand in the matter. Even if the harm was unintentional, the person who caused harm needs to take responsibility for their actions. Ultimately, taking responsibility must be a personal choice and cannot be imposed on someone unwillingly. 

Taking responsibility is painful, and it’s something we’ve been trained in our society not to do. Everyone screws up - it’s inevitable. We need to go back to these old practices of what it means to live in community with each other, and make it OK to take responsibility, to say “I wish that didn’t happen, but it did and I’m sorry.” - Noelle Cordeaux

4. Repair

After respect and responsibility have been established, the next step towards healing is the repair process. The person who caused harm is expected to repair the harm that they did to the fullest extent possible, while also knowing full well that not all of the harm can necessarily be repaired. The repair principle replaces thoughts of revenge and punishment, instead focusing on moving forward in a more positive direction.

5. Reintegration

In order to complete the process, the community/group/system allows the person who caused harm to accept responsibility and begin the reintegration process. The opposite of "cancel culture", reintegration encourages collaboration between the community and the person who caused harm, rather than using coercion and isolation. This process recognizes the assets that the person who caused harm brings to the table, and what they have learned through the process. By accepting responsibility and agreeing to repair harm, the person who caused harm creates space and trust to be reintegrated into the community.

Practical Application of the Five R's

In the accompanying podcast episode, John and Noelle discuss how these can be used in our personal relationships, including: parenting, friend circles, community groups, and in the workplace.

Ready to Become A Coach?

A lot of talented people like you dream of having a coaching business, but aren’t quite sure how to get there. We train and certify adventurous coaches, making sure you’ve got all you need to build a business you love and transform lives, on your terms. If you're ready to learn more about how to become a life coach, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training program

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

How I Chose My Life Coaching Niche: A Lesson In Hope
Guest blog by Coach Graciela Moore
Sep 15, 2021
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Guest blog by Graciela Moore

Graciela Moore

Graciela Moore is a motivational story-teller and creator of the Hope Series and the Hope Enthusiasts Club. She helps people thrive in  mindfulness, confidence and hope, by facilitating a transcendental journey into soul-alignment.

Graciela graduated from the JRNI Coaching Intensive in 2021. You can connect and follow her work on Instagram @SongofMyself.IG or explore her work on her website:


Or... How I Chose My Life Coaching Niche

I was six-years-old and pretending to have a conversation with someone who wasn’t there. They were speaking to me in English and I was answering in English, although I didn’t know what I was saying since Spanish is my first language and the only language spoken in my house growing up.

That little six year old wanted to speak, she had a story to tell, she had a message and a mission!

Since that time, I’ve spent my whole life exercising hope (and growing into that concept). In so doing, I've learned a lot about waiting, and the patience needed to focus on the goal ahead... while still in the process of accomplishing it. It's something that I've been hyper-focused on since forever, really. The eagerness of being caught in the “in between” while you work on one thing and then the next.

From that first scene at six years old, let's fast forward 30 years.

There I am, in the middle of my training program to become a Certified Life Coach with JRNI Coaching. Putting in the hours, making the connections and spending a considerable amount of time questioning and pondering coaching niches and my unique "message" as a coach. I was on the cusp of discomfort; analyzing my past experiences one by one and still feeling like I was failing to make sense of it all.  

Despite all the homework exercises and the revelatory conversations I was having, I still had no clue how to narrow down a whole lifetime of experience into a single concept that would serve as my coaching “niche”. I remembered John Kim’s words in the Everything Life Coaching podcast episode Stop Obsessing Over Your Niche:

“Your story is your niche, so share it!” 

This insight allowed me to look at the experiences I had already highlighted in my life story, and find the common thread through it all. It gave me permission to ease up on the search, and to look within.

On a parallel note, at the same time that I’m trying to figure this “coaching niche thing” for my life coach certification, I received a call to talk about the topic of Hope for the members of my church. They could’ve asked me to talk about anything, but Hope was it. As I thought about it, I realized that this “hope thing” was not just about a speaking opportunity with my church. I decided to look at my coaching assignments through the lens of hope as well. 

I reviewed my journals from 15 years ago and found HOPE all over them! It was a signature theme in my life, and the thread that held my story together.

Through limitations and broken dreams growing up in Puerto Rico, hope was still at the center of it all. Hope was always the beacon of light beckoning me forward, to keep growing and working towards magnifying my purpose. I went through it all knowing, and hoping with all that I had, that I would make it to this moment.  

When it came to explore my personal story and how it might relate to choosing a coaching niche, I asked myself 3 questions: 

  • What matters most to me? 
  • What do I want to talk about? 
  • What do I want others to walk away with, after meeting with me? 

The answer was the same for all three: HOPE.

Just like that, that six-year-old island girl who grew up fantasizing about moving to the USA and creating a life of positive impact for other people was finally put to work on a legit purpose and a concrete path!

Just a few days after being invited to talk about hope, I tuned into the Everything Life Coaching podcast again. This time it was episode “The Value of A Coaching Session”, where JRNI co-founders Noelle and John discuss the values that we bring to the table as coaches. As they were talking about concepts related to confidentiality and the coaching relationship itself, I was really struck when John Kim added to that list “an injection of hope”. 

Two mentions of Hope in a single week? That was enough of a sign and confirmation for me that this was real, so I went for it. I sat down with my coach hat on and started investigating hope from a psychological perspective. From there, my Hope Series was born: “Creating and Maintaining Hope in Difficult Times” (or How to Achieve a Perfect Brightness of Hope). 

I believe that it’s important to understand and master the art of waiting for goals to manifest and good things to come. Why? Because I’ve learned that it’s what we choose to do in the "in between" time that makes all the difference. 

That’s what the coaching series I was inspired to create is all about. 

When we understand the neuroscience of it, what’s clear is that a mindset of Hopefulness can in fact be learned, practiced and maintained, just like any other good (or not-so-helpful!) habit.

Learning more about how neuroplasticity allows us to actually rewire our brains for hope was a huge source of inspiration for my coaching practice. It inspired me to come up with 31 daily affirmations and journal promptings, and to create a coaching space where people can actively come together, support one another, and practice hope together. 

In my work, understanding hope as a habit is a critical element in the process of goal attainment. 

It’s like everything else in life: it starts within you. What begins with self awareness evolves into something more: a change of heart. When we set goals, what we’re doing is not only making a commitment to pursue a particular outcome or course of action, but to also hold space for HOPE to work its magic.

As individuals, hope is the anchor that keeps us grounded every single day in between the present moment and the day when we reach any given goal in our life. Holding hope is essential for flourishing. Hope is my life, I’m working hard every day and still waiting for other things to come. 

As coaches, we can only be a vessel of hope for our clients after we master this concept for ourselves. Our own cup must be full before we can pour into others. I feel honored and blessed to be able to share this message and even privileged to hold a space of hope for others.

 Whether you are a coach, or are aspiring to become one, I invite all who are interested in building your Hope muscles to join me in Creating and Maintaining Hope in Difficult Times, a 6-week experience of reframing and hoping... together. 

Want to Become A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches like Graciela ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in science, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.

Life Coaching
Want to Apply Positive Psychology to Your Life Coaching Practice? Here's How!
Tools to help your coaching clients thrive
Sep 16, 2021
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Wondering how life coaching and positive psychology are connected? If so, you’re not alone! Let’s start with some simple definitions to get clear about the differences, and where these two disciplines intersect.

What’s Life Coaching?

Life coaching is a partnership where a coach and client come together to accomplish a specific and measurable goal. Rather than telling the client “how to get there”, coaching holds that each person carries innate wisdom, and is capable of developing their own answers. As coaches, we assist this process by helping our clients think strategically, identify self-imposed limitations, and overcome roadblocks.

The Goal of Coaching is to help clients reach a state of flourishing through goal accomplishment.

What’s Positive Psychology?

Positive psychology is the science behind how individuals and groups flourish and thrive. It’s the study of emotions, behaviors and beliefs that emphasize human strengths rather than weaknesses. Positive psychology provides new empirical data and specific tools to help people move along a continuum from “baseline wellness” to a state of thriving.

The Goal of Positive Psychology is to help us identify the goodness and strength inside ourselves, and find ways to lean into those attributes across all aspects of our lives.  

In Pursuit of “The Good Life”

The field of positive psychology is extensive, but it all boils down to a very simple central theme: improving our quality of life. Like coaching, the aim of positive psychology is to help us grow into ever better versions of ourselves. Each of these disciplines is centered around cultivating the internal qualities that help people achieve higher levels of satisfaction and contentment in life.

Both coaching and positive psychology start from an assumption of mental health and wellness, building toward a desired future state by tapping into a client's strengths and self-efficacy.

Wellness continuum - from suffering to flourishing

The field of positive psychology was catalyzed by Dr. Martin E.P. Seligman, who believed there was something important missing from the field of psychiatry. The concept of “flourishing” has been the subject of philosophical thought for thousands of years, but only emerged as the subject of serious scientific inquiry in the 1990’s.

At the time, psychiatry was predominantly focused on mental suffering, and ways of easing emotional pain in life. Seligman asserted that pain isn’t the whole story of the human experience. He championed the idea that the brighter side of life was also worthy of serious study! 

The work of Dr. Martin Seligman and his colleagues sought to discover how people achieve and sustain positive states of mind, which eventually became an entire field of study. We’re talking now about the good stuff: joy, love, gratitude, laughter, achievement and contentment (among others). 

Today, Positive Psychology offers us a scientific approach for understanding human potential, along with a set of research-based interventions and practices for achieving it.

How Is Positive Psychology Used In Life Coaching?

In positive psychology, the primary aim is to help us develop an inner toolkit for growth and life satisfaction that's rooted in our personal strengths.

This isn’t to be confused with a “Good Vibes Only” point of view! In this context, positive doesn't mean "happy all the time." The science isn’t suggesting we attempt to obliterate any trace of negative thoughts or emotions. Instead, we use them as a starting point for investigation. 

Understanding negative emotion is essential in life coaching because no matter what issue your client might be facing, negative feeling states will likely come into play at some point. Every one of us has a unique set of factors that catalyze our negative emotions, as well as how we experience them.

Left unexamined, negative emotions can get in the way of your client’s ability to develop insight, find solutions to challenges, and stay focused on what they want to accomplish. 

Much of our work as coaches involves recognizing a client’s inner voice of criticism, diminishment or self doubt, and helping them learn how to work with those thoughts more productively. 

Working with Emotions

When we’re applying any positive psychology exercise in a coaching context, our starting point must always be an assessment of client readiness. Before introducing an exercise or intervention, consider:

  • Is the client in a stable emotional place? 
  • Is there a desire and commitment to focus on the thoughts and conditions that will lead to improving their overall happiness and wellbeing? 
  • Is the client willing to do homework, and try new things? 

Making the Shift from Negative to Positive Emotional States

According to positive psychology coach and author Margaret Moore, if we want to understand how emotions shape our thoughts and actions, there are two main parts of the brain to take into account:

  • The prefrontal cortex is located in the front of the brain directly behind our forehead. This is our brain's logic center, responsible for driving our focus from one task to the next. 
  • The limbic system is a more ancient part of the human brain. This is where we process our emotions - both positive and negative.

FUN FACT: Positive emotions improve our prefrontal cortex functioning while negative emotions impair it. 

Unfortunately, negative emotions are "sticky" and positive emotions are "slippery". What this means is that we have to work hard to hold onto our positive emotions, while negative feelings have an irritating way of hanging around.

In brief? We lose hold of good feelings quickly, and need to work harder to release the more unpleasant ones. (Sad but true!)

Not only that, our negative feelings have the power to actually shut off the thinking part of our brain. Seriously! When the limbic system kicks in due to the onset of a negative emotion, the functioning of our prefrontal cortex is suspended. (Double whammy!)

According to Moore, there are two main sources of negative emotion that we need to recognize and know how to work with as life coaches: internal and external. Here's what you ought to know:

  • External: We all have our own triggers and responses to outside sources of stimulation. Think: traffic, noise, clutter, etc. One of the most important things you can do for your clients is to help them understand what consistently pushes their buttons and brings on feelings of irritation, frustration, anger or negativity. Coaching intervention:How can the client anticipate and mitigate their external triggers?
  • Internal: The other trigger is inside our own mind, where it can be nestled in deep and much harder to spot for ourselves! As coaches, we have many ways of labeling these thoughts, including: the inner critic, limiting beliefs and cognitive bias. You get the idea. Helping your client to recognize what their own unhelpful voices sound like is essential to gaining control over negative emotions. Coaching intervention: How can the client begin to disassociate from and neutralize the negative self-talk inside their own head?

The Power of Positive Emotions

What positive psychology research has shown is that positive emotions not only feel good, they also improve our health and enhance feelings of social connection. This in turn stimulates our vagus nerve, which oversees the parasympathetic nervous system.

What this means in plain English is that our emotions actually produce mental and physical outcomes that can have a big impact on how we experience life.

  • Stress and trauma activate the sympathetic nervous system, which governs our fight/flight/freeze response. 
  • Positive emotions can stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system, which oversees rest and digestion.

Think of positive experiences like nutrients. We need lots of them in order to create a constant flow of feel-good emotions that lead to lasting health benefits.

In other words, eating one vegetable a week is not going to cut it. In order to receive the full nutritional impact, you need a constant diet. And here's the good news: you don’t have to be a “naturally cheerful person” to experience these benefits! We can all intentionally cultivate positive emotions and enjoy their impact on our health and wellbeing. 

Here’s just a few examples:

  • Frequently experiencing joy drives us to acquire better and more diverse skills. 
  • Gratitude strengthens social bonds and skills for loving.
  • Serenity allows us to modify our self-perception and view of the world.
  • Hope brings increased resilience.
  • Pride unlocks motivation for achievement.
  • Amusement builds friendship and creativity.
  • Inspiration increases skills and feelings of morality.
  • Awe allows us to see ourselves as part of a larger whole.
  • Love impacts all of the above!

Positive emotions prepare us for growth by broadening our mindset. The more moments we experience inside a broadened mindset, the more we can fundamentally change who we are and become better versions of ourselves. As coaches, THIS is the state of mind we want to help our clients cultivate!

Want more on this topic? Check out the work of positive psychology researcher Barbara Frederickson in the blog Using Broaden-and-Build Theory In Your Coaching Practice

Coach’s Toolkit: Positive Psychology Interventions and Techniques

How does positive psychology help coaches? By providing evidence-based tools that can help drive lasting change and increase overall satisfaction in life. For life coaches who want a framework for helping their clients get consistent and measurable results, there are many effective interventions to draw from.

Positive psychology techniques coaches frequently use include:

  • Knowing and appreciating your strengths
  • Identifying personal values and priorities
  • Understanding your life purpose
  • Cultivating positive emotions and gratitude
  • Resilience and coping skills
  • Reframing a situation to recognize where you have agency, ability, and tools to make change
  • Self-acceptance and compassion 
  • Future visioning and working toward a “best possible future self”
  • Developing healthy habits and strengthening personal accountability

PRO TIP: Coaching Isn't Therapy

As we apply theories and tools from the field of psychology to the domain of coaching, it’s important to remember that coaching is not therapy. If the distinction between these two fields feels murky, check out: The Difference Between a Therapist and a Life Coach!

When working with people’s thoughts, emotions, and unconscious beliefs, we encourage coach practitioners to maintain a clear understanding of what we’re trained and qualified to do... and what we’re not. To that end, it's advisable to earn a coaching certification from a credible life coach training program. Our clients are best served when we learn how to apply the tools of positive psychology (and other coaching frameworks) ethically and responsibly!

Want to Become A Coach?

One of our values at JRNI is that we dare to be different. Our coaches ignore the expectations society tries to impose on them, and seek to live from their own truth instead. If you are ready to step into your power and you’d like some partners in the process, come check out JRNI Life Coach Training. Grounded in the science of positive psychology, our ICF accredited program features authentic instructors, a robust curriculum, and business instruction to prepare you for liftoff.

JRNI Coaching: Vibrant community. Evidence-based life coach training. Lifetime support.


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